BILLINGS — Families of organ donors attended the Donation Celebration event at Big Horn Resort on Saturday to honor their loved ones and listen to the story of an organ donor recipient.
Life Center Northwest is a nonprofit organization based out of Bellevue, Washington that helps to facilitate organ and tissue donations. They travel to Montana, Idaho, Washington, and Alaska to put on Donation Celebrations and highlight stories of organ donation. They also assist with the donation registry in Montana. Currently, there are 149 waiting for an organ transplant in the state.
For Jim Shelden, a new heart meant a new chance at life. He now lives in Bozeman but is sharing his story to help comfort families and show his gratitude for being alive.
Shelden was eventually diagnosed with a heart murmur from a young age. However, it began to cause problems, and was once found unconscious in someone's yard after his heart stopped. Ten years ago, he learned that he would need a new one, and eight months later, doctors found one.
“My donor, his name is Nelson. He was a young man in the Seattle area and was killed in an unfortunate traffic accident,” said Shelden.
Nelson Yarbrough was 26 years old when he passed away. He had chosen to be an organ donor, and that decision is what saved Shelden.
“Every morning when I wake up, I give thanks for the new day. I thank Nelson for his life because he sustains me," spoke Shelden in his speech. "Right there is a heartbeat. That's not me. That's Nelson.”
The new heart gave him strength that was not there before and a new outlook on life.
“It's hard to say how life would be without all of the things that have come to pass, but I just wouldn't be here. I wouldn't have seen my grandchildren," said Shelden.
He wanted to learn more about his donor and reached out to his family. A year later, he heard back and eventually made a plan to meet.
“We've been in contact with each other since. We support each other and talk to each other. They're my family and I'm their family,” said Shelden. “We cry a lot and we hug each other a lot. We laugh and we smile a lot. We're all family in a very, very intimate way.”
Nelson's heart and legacy now beat with him.
“He's with me every day. He's with me every second. I feel him all the time, and he's my best friend," said Shelden. "It causes me to think about what does it mean to be alive and what does it mean to live a good life. I don't really have a good answer for that yet, but I'm working on it."
For many, the topic of organ donations brings complex emotions, as one life is saved, another is lost. Shannon and Robert Durbin from Washington know that feeling all too well.
“We flew over to Montana for the Life Center Northwest donation ceremony to honor our son Spencer, who passed on 10, 22, 22," said Shannon.
They traveled from Washington to attend the event. Their son passed away from an accidental drug overdose at age 21. His kidneys, liver, heart, and over 50 grafts of tissue were donated and have saved countless people.
“He's the kid that stuck up for the underdogs, people who got picked on, people who got bullied, so it was just natural, I think, for him to donate his organs too. He's still donating and giving, even though he's not here today with us," said Robert.
They remember Spencer through many signs every day. His number in lacrosse was 22 and he passed away on Oct. 22 of 2022. The Durbins both got matching tattoos in honor of their son and the tattoo he had.
“Our son Spencer had, 'Everything happens for a reason,' and this is actually his initials tattoo on his arm. In his mom's handwriting," said Robert.
Spencer first got the tattoo in March of 2022 in Maui when he and his family were celebrating his sobriety. After his passing, his parents went back to Maui, to the same place where he had to get the tattoo and add his initials. The tattoo reminds them each day of their son's mantra and to keep his memory alive by living fully in his honor.
Now, they are wanting to put awareness out for preventing drug overdoses. They are working on Project 22 to help get better access to life-saving medicines, like Naloxone, and have it available for people to carry with them. It is an initiative to help save lives and prevent overdoses from happening.
The weight of losing a loved one is something that never gets easier. The Durbins felt that Saturday's event and the others they have attended have helped progress their grieving process, and by listening to Shelden's story, they can connect with others who understand their journey and draw hope.
"Spencer is loved and has helped so many. We're going to try to honor him and keep his spirit alive, keep his legacy alive, and he's our hero," said Shannon.
Sheldon also felt connected to those who attended and spoke with many of them after his speech. It has helped him to come to terms with the sacrifice that was made and the families that had to go through those terrible tragedies.
"These people are wonderful people. They're lovely people. We're all just common folk and we're getting by and living this life that best we can,” said Shelden.
Shelden wants to remind others how vital organ donation can be and to consider becoming a donor if they have not already.
“It's a gift of life. It's a wonderful gift. It's a priceless gift. It's great to be alive," said Shelden.
To learn more about becoming an organ donor, click here.
